I fell in love with Jaques Pepin when he said, quite without irony, that it was alright to use canned beans in certain recipes — and then proceeded to open a tin and do just that. Great chef, more concerned with showing people how to make good, simple food, than with all the intricacies of soaking overnight and growing your own. I thought it was pretty fabulous.
…well, this evening I finally saw something to top even that. Anthony Bourdain, cracking and devouring a small mountain of shellfish, using nothing but his hands.
Now, this comes with a story. Many years ago I had a French boyfriend, and said boyfriend and I sat down to a seafood dinner with Mint. You should know that I love fresh shellfish with a passion unrivaled by any other foodstuff. After watching me hand-crack and devour my own small mountain of shellfish, my boyfriend turned to Mint, saying, “If you want to know how a woman is in bed, watch her eat.”
Oh no! Our heroine has been hypnotized by the Master! What will become of her? Will the Doctor arrive in time to save her? Tune in tomorrow to find out!
“I try to never watch. It takes me so long to get over it and I’m always so downcast. I find it really distressing,” he says. “Maybe when I’m very old, I’ll sit down and watch my earlier work. But it will just depress the hell out of me. I’m sure I’m not alone in this. It’s not like I’m some weirdo. You just see how far short it falls from where you might have imagined you were heading. I have a perfectly average skewed perception of myself. We often don’t know what we’re like. I hope that’s the case because otherwise I’ll kill myself.” He chuckles.
The onus of interviewing him fell to the editor of the LA Times book review, and he made the mistake of trying to talk politics. I’m not sure fiction would have been much better, but only a madman argues politics with Vidal. Even with rather well-researched notes, Vidal still left him totally speechless more often than not.
The poor fellow was doomed before he even began, but all things considered I thought he held his own remarkably well — I told him so as he was making a rather hasty exit — after all, he did manage to form complete sentences throughout, which seems to be rather a laudable achievement in this particular circumstance.
It wasn’t that Vidal was particularly vicious, certainly he was mild in comparison to how he behaves with people he dislikes. It’s just that he’s absolutely impossible to argue with; he’s so well-versed in history and politics that listening to him talk is rather like being hit with an encyclopedia, his replies brook no reproach.
Not to mention that he’s effortlessly venomous, intellectually terrifying, and has that natural, imperialistic grace that reduces mere mortals to dust. Even if he’s rather tired these days, and doesn’t bother to hide the fact that he’s in a wheelchair, he’s a giant of a man. There’s a reason he got a standing ovation just for coming onstage.
Don’t stand idly by and see the youth of the world denied the joy that is high fructose corn syrup and yellow #5 dye! Donate your leftover candy corn today!!!
!! ALICE COOPER IN CONCERT TONIGHT !!
…so if I am not around tomorrow, well, you know what happened. *cough*
"Now you come up here—that is the thing to do. I, also have Scotch whisky, certain lemons, & hot water, & struggle with the same every night."
~Mark Twain
